Friday, January 22, 2016

Meteorologists in Bed with Big Bread?

You have to ask yourself: 

  • Why do weather men and women get so excited about weather events?
  • Why do you need to know about weather that is happening someplace else?
  • Who is lining the pockets of the nation's meteorologists?

I propose that the powerful Dairy Lobby and Big Bread corporations have meteorologists in their pocket. Who stands to benefit from inducing panic over weather events? Think about it.

Every time there is a major snow storm on the way, Moms everywhere rush to the supermarket and buy all of the bread and milk. Every time without fail. All of the bread. All of the milk. Who even uses that much bread or milk? Under normal circumstances I have a difficult time finishing a quart of milk or loaf of bread before it goes bad or acquires new growth. Why do moms need all of the bread and milk anyways?

Unless you live out in the country there is no need for food panic. Modern infrastructure is strong enough (thanks obama) that this shouldn't have to happen. It is an old conditional response created by the bread industry and milk interests.

And so since everyone is conditioned to buy bread and milk and hunker down it benefits bread/milk to have meteorologists hype major weather events. They get exciting music and special flashy graphics and extra air time to scare you with "news" of frightening winter weather. Fear Mongering Patent Pending USA.

"Maybe I want to know the weather so I can plan accordingly," you say as a rational person. Fine. So then why do news stations create snow panic when your area is not getting any snow? Half of my local news this morning was about how much snow NY/DC/East coast was going to get POUNDED by THE POLAR VORTEX STORM OF THE CENTURY! I better go buy some bread! I wouldn't want to go a day without a poor-person sandwich (ketchup/kraft single on wonderbread).

And don't forget to close all the schools! The kids need a day off from their government mandated programming to stay at home and consume media! Keep the populace dumb and distracted!

Thursday, January 7, 2016

Tila Tequila's Twitter Feed

Some of you might remember Tila Tequila from whatever MTV show she was on like a decade ago. But most of  you don't know that she died in 2012 and has been replaced with a clone. A clone which happens to be a cyborg Russian spy. And all of you are sitting at home, mind controlled, and all you want to to is "SHARE COCA COLAS N S***"

Publicity stunt, or gone crazy? Check out her Twitter feed @AngelTilaLove and read some of the stuff she is tweeting. It's legendary. Here is an imgur album with some screen grabs.

While this might seem fun and silly, it's common to see celebrities go off the deep end. Brittney Spears went nuts. Amanda Bynes fell off. Lindsay Lohan, obviously. It's unfortunate. Are these people crazy to begin with? Is it a result of fame? The pressures of Hollywood? Or is it something more sinister. These young people are disposable vessels for the men in charge and they need to be disposed of so that fresh meat can be brought in.

Fact: MK-Ultra

What is Hollywood if not a powerful propaganda machine? People love consuming media. Media sets the tone of the national narrative. Whoever controls the media controls the populace. Is it the US Government? Is it secret NAZI's?

Wednesday, January 6, 2016

Chipotle vs Big Agro

Chipotle is a fast casual restaurant chain that has become so ubiquitous that other fast casual joints describe their own themes as "it's like Chipotle, but for [sushi, pizza, Mediterranean, salad (salad bar?), etc]." There is certainly power in that and not just brand power. When a part of an entire industry invokes your product/methodology you become like a Kleenex, Xerox, Coke, Sharpie, and other proprietary eponyms.

So everyone knows Chipotle. They have some power. I personally enjoy a good Chipotle burrito and consequently think about them from time to time (both the brand and their burritos). And I think that there is a conspiracy against Chipotle being perpetrated by Big Agriculture.

Besides the a-la-carte style of building your meal, Chipotle is known as being very publicly ingredient conscious. They proclaim using fresh local produce, humanely raised livestock (non-HgH beef, free range chicken, etc), and most recently they have been quite vocal about all of their ingredients being Non-GMO.

Being non-GMO isn't necessarily anti-GMO, but it certainly reads that way. So who would want to shutter a powerful anti-GMO company? Someone who would stand to profit largely from GMOs. Big Agro.

Let's Talk About GMOs.

Before going any further, I want to take a quick minute to discuss Genetically Modified Organisms. I'm not taking sides on this one because it is not required for this article. But it is important to note that there are passionate people/groups on both sides of pro/anti GMO. It is a public conversation that is still in its infancy and has not been resolved.

GMOs usually refer to plant-based life. Agriculture. In its most simple form a strain of wheat--for example--that has been bred over generations from the hardiest strains (ie. to survive both wetter and drier growing conditions) may be considered a genetically modified organism. In a more extreme form, the actual DNA of the plant has been manipulated in a lab.

Arguments for GMOs: do you like fresh tomatoes in the winter that don't rot within 2 days? Do you like larger fruits and vegetables that take less resources to produce? Do you like disease-resistant crops? Then you are probably pro-GMO. These all sound great.

Arguments against GMOs include the classic "mankind playing God" argument that we don't really know what we're doing and in the short term it seems great but the risk of screwing everything up forever is present. That it's not natural, and that natural equals better.

To me, though, the main argument against GMO crops comes in the form of one company having a monopoly on the entire food supply. Because the companies doing the research and creating the GMO crops have trademarks on the strains and require farmers to buy only their seeds if they want to continue receiving their subsidies.  But you can't control nature. If you're an organic farmer and the farmer across the street uses GMO corn and then the wind blows and their custom gmo corn pollinates your organic corn, guess what: you are stealing from the GMO corn company by using their product without a license or paying them.

I'll just say it. That one company is Monsanto. Check out Netflix and YouTube for some good documentaries about Monsanto and its iron grip on farmers.

You get the idea by now. We can talk more in depth about GMOs later. Corn feeds America. Corn feeds livestock. Control the corn, control it all.

Chipotle and the GMO

Here's where the conspiracy part comes into play. So Chipotle is a powerful brand that is very vocally anti-GMO and Big Agro (Monsanto) doesn't like that. And Monsanto is powerful and evil, etc. So they have been sabotaging Chipotle's food suppliers.

First it was Chipotle's Carnitas (pork) supplier that "didn't meet their standards" and so they didn't have carnitas for a while. Now we get reports about E.Coli, salmonella, and norovirus outbreaks across Chipotle's national restaurants. They are even being subpoenaed in a criminal investigation over these outbreaks.

It's not hard to see that maybe they are being deliberately sabotaged by Monsanto in order to sway public opinion on the matter. Outbreaks like this ruin food companies. Remember Chi-Chi's? They were a super popular Tex-Mex joint until all the salsa had Hepatitis-B or something. Now they are extinct. And what better way to show that non-GMO food isn't safe? Have outbreaks. And who would profit from non-GMO food being shown not to be safe? Monsanto.

What do you think? I smell foul play.

In the near future we will either no longer have Chipotle, or we will see them "Proudly serving Genetically Superior Ingredients."

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